Month: January 2007

It’s amazing how the mansion gets bigger as the number of teams gets smaller.

Oh, great. Cecille thinks she’s Paris Hilton. All she needed was a purse to stuff the chihuahua in and she would have been as happy as a dog sniffing butts. Someone call PETA!

Seriously, though, did she ever think about the effect of those bracelets around its neck? Not just the strangling effect, but what it would do to Nate’s chances for getting phone numbers. Being a gay film student may have worked for Chuck during Season 1, but why would a fruity dude carrying a fruity dog be asking for girls’ digits?

Can you imagine what those three girls at the end of the challenge thought when two strange guys with dogs did a bum rush in their direction? “Oh my God, we’re being attacked! Someone throw a doggie bone over there to distract them so we can make a break for it!”

Niels, I feel your pain about getting phone numbers, buddy…

Apparently, the plastic bands for necklaces wasn’t cutesy enough for Cecille. An animal print cloth for a roof? That thing might have worked as a large-scale sun umbrella, but a dog house… sheesh.

The other three, hey, they were functional, but I admit I was rooting for Megan because she put up that row of shingles. If you want to prove you’ve got some mad carpenter skills, make the shingles happen, baby.

And there we have it! This season’s beauty/geek love connection! Not like it was a big surprise—according to the interview clips the editors picked out, those two have been gushing over each other for weeks now.

I thought that for the first time in three seasons, we were finally going to see a tie-breaker before the final episode. No such luck. People are probably speculating that there are multiple questions on the cards to try to prevent stuff like that from happening—I can relate to that theory—but when the question includes the phrase “according to your study materials”, the answer usually isn’t the one the viewers think it should be. Season 1: “According to your study materials, who is supposed to pay for the first date?” Bill said the guy (the answer most people would have given), but in the book, it said it’s the person who asked the other one out. What a pisser…

… and Payback’s name is Cecille.

I swear to God, this is the first time I’ve thought, “Please don’t put her on the screen again. Pleeeeeease… I know she’s got great breasts, but that smirk hurts me in my soul.” Naturally, the editors ignored me.

During Season 1, they gave us champagne at the end of the challenges. On Sundays (our day off), there was enough for two beers each. Now they have no qualms about people getting wasted. Seeing Erin dance on the boat in her heels might have seemed hot, but I’m surprised the producers weren’t more concerned about her slipping and cracking her skull open. Drunk = good TV. Death from being drunk = not-so-good TV.

Speaking of drunk, the circle of blondes has been broken! Cecille’s bitching about Niels drove everyone out of the room!

I was giving Niels props before: he took a stand against the spoiled Jennylee, he defied the standards of fashion when choosing his makeover and succeeded… now I think he’s just a stubborn dick. He wasn’t supposed to be teaching the girls martial arts on the beach. They weren’t wearing gis, they weren’t taking their shoes off at the edge of the mat and they sure as hell weren’t bowing to him at the beginning of the class. (On the other hand, crawling around like a bear did give him a nice view of their haunches.)

Nate, do us all a favor and burn those tights. Please.

Scooter told the girls about 3rd position in ballet; Megan said if a guy brought her to a ballet, she’d think he was gay. Hmmm… I bet that’s why he was in the threesome! Chicks always dig the gay guys! Man, sometimes being straight really sucks… (And that was me being sarcastic, so for all you male readers out there, please don’t give me your phone numbers. If you really want to give me a call, try 1-800-555-I-DON’T-DATE-GUYS!)

Wasn’t it nice how encouraging the host was while the girls were searching for the walkie-talkies? “Someone’s found a box! She’s opening it… oh, snap! It’s empty! Sucks to be you!”

I wonder how close the race on the kayaks was. Seriously. I’m thinking Megan reached shore about five minutes after Cecille did. I’m also thinking that if all five guys had thought up decent upper-body workouts on the beach, paddling to the other side would hurt like hell.

“It’s only fair that since you sent us to the elimination room, we should send you now.” Why did they show Jennylee and Niels’ reaction while Cecille said it? Is it the slightest bit possible that there was a hint of remorse on her face because she kinda liked Jennylee? Naaaaah… she’s evil, remember?

Seeing Nate jumping up and down when Jennylee got her questions right was really funny and really weird at the same time. I remember thinking “Oh, Jesus…” while Richard was bouncing around and yelling “Gadzooks!” when Scarlet and Mindi were in the elimination room—I can only imagine what the other people were thinking while Nate was doing basically the same thing.

Drew was wearing kind of a stylish outfit during his final interview (especially compared to the picture of the galaxy on his t-shirt in the first episode). Do you think they gave the guys more than one makeover set of clothes? Make sure they were dressed up nice before hitting the road? Just a thought.

And the other half of the “Beauty and the Geek” coin is about to fall. They already found someone to be evil—now it looks like a geek will be hooking up with a beauty next week. Tune in to see…