I was bored tonight and opted to avoid doing anything productive with my time by surfing around on the Internet. Trust me, after years of practice, I’ve become pretty damn good at avoiding it. I ended up checking out Myspace and found yet another<\/i> bulletin with a bunch of survey questions. This time, I decided to take it. I also decided to post the results here on the blog because, hey, why the hell not? It gives you all a chance to peek into the mind of little ol’ me (assuming that I’m little and that it’s actually me<\/i> who’s writing this) and you might decide to take the survey on your own.<\/p>\n
Mind you, I didn’t want to make this completely serious. If I was<\/i> completely serious, I could end up making both of us cry by the end of the entry. Consequently, I’m writing two versions: one that’s sincere and one that’s not so sincere<\/i>. If you can’t tell the difference… I might be the only one crying at the end.
\n________________________________________<\/p>\n
1. Where is your cell phone?<\/b>
\nPocket
\nRectum<\/i><\/p>\n
2. Boyfriend\/girlfriend\/spouse?<\/b>
\nCasie
\nTwelve<\/i><\/p>\n
3. Your hair?<\/b>
\nHighlights
\nPalms<\/i><\/p>\n
4. Work?<\/b>
\nFrustrating
\nWelfare<\/i><\/p>\n
5. Your father?<\/b>
\nHealthy
\nBiological?<\/i><\/p>\n
6. Your favorite thing?<\/b>
\nFamily
\nPORN!<\/i><\/p>\n
7. Your dream last night?<\/b>
\nUnsure
\nFoursome<\/i><\/p>\n
8. Your favorite drink?<\/b>
\nGatorade
\nCOFFEE-COFFEE-COFFEE-COFFEE!!!<\/i><\/p>\n
9. What is your dream car?<\/b>
\nRolls
\nHerbie<\/i><\/p>\n
10. The room you\u2019re in?<\/b>
\nBedroom
\nKennel<\/i><\/p>\n
11. Pets?<\/b>
\nNone
\nBunkmates<\/i><\/p>\n
13. What do you want to be in 10 years?<\/b>
\nYouthful
\nSuperman<\/i><\/p>\n
14. Where did you hang out last night?<\/b>
\nHome
\nTree<\/i><\/p>\n
15. What are you not good at?<\/b>
\nMotivation
\nPooping<\/i><\/p>\n
16. Eyebrow rings on the opposite sex?<\/b>
\nMeh
\nSlobber<\/i><\/p>\n
17. One of your wish list items?<\/b>
\nCash
\nPORN!<\/i><\/p>\n
18. Where you grew up?<\/b>
\nLakeville
\nUterus<\/i><\/p>\n
19. The last thing you did?<\/b>
\nMyspace
\nPORN!<\/i><\/p>\n
20. What are you wearing?<\/b>
\nUnderthings
\nG-string<\/i><\/p>\n
21. What aren’t you wearing?<\/b>
\nPants
\nProtection<\/i><\/p>\n
22. Your computer?<\/b>
\nLaptop
\nPORN!<\/i><\/p>\n
23. Your life?<\/b>
\nSatisfactory
\nHasbro<\/i><\/p>\n
24. Your mood?<\/b>
\nAmused
\nSemi-jubilant<\/i><\/p>\n
25. Missing?<\/b>
\nCompleteness
\nThumbs?!<\/i><\/p>\n
26. What are you thinking about right now?<\/b>
\nHumor
\nSasquatch<\/i><\/p>\n
27. Your car?<\/b>
\nEscort
\nImmobile<\/i><\/p>\n
28. Your work?<\/b>
\nWorking
\nNonexistent<\/i><\/p>\n
29. Your summer?<\/b>
\nSunny
\nRehab<\/i><\/p>\n
30. Your relationship status?<\/b>
\nHappy
\nPolygamous<\/i><\/p>\n
31. Your favorite color?<\/b>
\nBlue
\nSasquatch<\/i><\/p>\n
32. When is the last time you laughed?<\/b>
\nMidnight
\n12:00<\/i><\/p>\n
33. Last time you cried?<\/b>
\n3rd?
\n12:01<\/i><\/p>\n
34. School?<\/b>
\nLaw
\nFlunked<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I was bored tonight and opted to avoid doing anything productive with my time by surfing around on the Internet. Trust me, after years of practice, I’ve become pretty damn good at avoiding it. I ended up checking out Myspace and found yet another bulletin with a bunch of survey questions. This time, I decided … <\/p>\n